Picture this: you get a phone call from the Juvenile Detention Center saying that your child has been arrested because he got into a fight at school with another student. Instead of charging the two students with a crime and setting a court date before a magistrate or judge, the court system schedules a mediation hearing. Huh, you ask? What exactly does this mean? What is mediation?

Mediation is a form of alternative dispute resolution (i.e. way to resolve a dispute without using the normal court process) whereby the parties are in control of the outcome. It is a voluntary process that is facilitated by a mediator, or a third-party neutral who is appointed by the court to help resolve the issues that put the parties in this position in the first place.

Mediation has garnered both great accolades and criticism over the recent years as it has become a more widely-used process in the court system. It is a process that is often utilized by juvenile courts when dealing with troubled children, or family courts when dealing with divorce and child-custody issues. The main reason that mediation is used in these types of cases is because it allows the parties to constructively voice their opinions, needs, and concerns, and promotes calm, rational thinking. It is through this process that the parties are able to come to an agreement that is created by them and them alone.

Think about it—if you were going through a painful divorce and you and your soon-to-be-ex both wanted custody of your children, would you rather come up with an agreement that was designed by the two of you, or would your rather put it in the hands of a judge who knows nothing about you or your family?

Next, we’ll look at an outline of the ever-popular Six-Step Method of mediation.

There are several ways to breakdown the mediation process. Many people label different parts of the process and designated "steps". Some courts have six steps, others have seven, and some may not even promote a "step" model. Here, we are going to outline the widely-used "Six-Step Method" of mediation.

The first step is the introduction, where the mediator introduces herself to the parties, sets the tone for the mediation, and lays out the ground rules of the process. The second step is where the parties constructively tell their sides of the story in order for the mediator to help identify the problems. Once the problems have been laid on the table, the mediator will help the parties to identify the underlying issues as part of the third step. The fourth step involves brainstorming amongst the parties to hopefully generate some possible resolutions that will satisfy all parties involved. The fifth step is where the mediator helps the parties to determine what the most realistic alternatives will be in order to resolve the issues. Finally, just like any good "LegalFlip.com" article, the sixth step is the conclusion, where the mediation agreement is drafted and the parties are praised for their rational thinking and hopefully productive behavior.

Next, we’ll look at the process of mediation in greater detail.

Now that you know the bare-bones of the "Six-Step Method", let’s go ahead and really outline how each step really works in greater detail.

The mediator, although not directly involved, is the facilitator of the process. As the facilitator, she must introduce herself, determine who the parties are and what their relationship is to one another (if any), and she must explain her role.

It is also at this point in the process that the mediator must explain the purpose and goals of the mediation (once again, to allow the parties themselves to resolve the problems and issues that were brought to the court’s attention and come to some type of mediation agreement). In addition to the general background information pertaining to the process, the mediator must also set the ground rules. Typically, the mediator will explain to the parties that only one person is permitted to speak at a time, and if the non-speaking party has something to say, he should jot it down on scrap paper that is provided by the court. Finally, before getting to the meat of the process, the mediator should get verbal confirmation from all parties involved that they understand the process and the rules, and that they have no further questions.

During the portion of the process, the mediator will listen to both parties and ask them each questions to either obtain more information or clarify the information that was already given. Usually, the mediator will start the storytelling process by asking a broad question. For example, she may say to one of the two children who got into a fight at school, "Tell me about what happened on that day." By asking a broad question, the mediator will likely elicit a substantial amount of information from each party. As that party continues to tell his story, the mediator may begin asking narrower questions in order to clarify what exactly happened. It is also typical for the mediator to ask questions beginning with "who, what, where, when, and why."

Next, let’s take a look at Step 3 and 4 in the mediation process.

During this stage of the process that the mediator outlines the issues that she sees based on the information presented by the parties during the “Storytelling” phase. By hearing each party’s side to the story, the mediator is able to narrow that information down to what appears to be the underlying issues surrounding those particular circumstances. More often than not, the issues that caused the parties to have conflict with one another are much deeper than the actual incident that sent them to mediation in the first place. For example, a fight between two teenage girls is often much more than just two girls who wanted to start beating on each other. By uncovering these issues, the parties can focus on solutions to address and hopefully alleviate underlying problems.

The parties, with some guidance from the mediator, brainstorm as many possible solutions as they can to address the underlying issues that were outlined in the previous phase. It is important to put all ideas on the table in order to generate as many solutions as possible. This phase helps to show why the previous "Issue Identification" phase was so important. By focusing on the underlying issues, the parties are able to focus on specific solutions that will help them remedy the problems that brought them to mediation in the first place.

Next, let’s take a look at Step 5 and 6 in the mediation process.

The mediator helps the parties determine what the most realistic alternatives will be in order to resolve the issues. It is here that the mediator directs the parties to consider all of the possible solutions they generated during the "Brainstorming" phase. By examining these solutions, the parties can then determine the specific solutions that will work best for them. The parties know themselves better than a third-party neutral, so it makes the most sense that they should be the ones who come up with a plan to assist in fixing the problem that warranted mediation in the first place.

During this portion of the process, the mediator takes the solutions that the parties agreed upon and memorializes them into a Mediation Agreement. The Mediation Agreement is the document that is essentially generated by the parties after the mediation process has been facilitated. The Mediation Agreement will be signed and dated by all parties to the mediation. Each party will get a copy of the Mediation Agreement, so they will be able to clearly see and remember the solutions that they generated. Once the Mediation Agreement has been drafted and signed, the mediator will often thank the parties for their cooperation, and congratulate them on a job well-done.

Finally, let’s take look at some main points to remember from this article.

In this article, we’ve learned that mediation is a form of alternative dispute resolution where the parties are in control of the outcome. It is a voluntary process that is facilitated by a mediator, or a third-party neutral who is appointed by the court to help resolve the issues that put the parties in this position in the first place.

We’ve learned that the main reason that mediation is used in cases is because it allows the parties to constructively voice their opinions, needs, and concerns, and promotes calm, rational thinking. It is through this process that the parties are able to come to an agreement that is created by them and them alone. In other words, mediation empowers the affected parties to use critical thinking skills to generate a solution that is acceptable to everyone.

The next time you enter into a dispute with someone consider mediation as a method to solve your dispute.